Tuesday, June 7, 2016
I just want to go home!
It's difficult to write about how much my anxiety cripples me because the last thing on my mind, at the time is posting on my blog. Little things trigger my anxiety and along with my Schizophrenia, my mind works constantly against me. The other day I was in a McDonald's drive thru and a familiar anxiety reared its ugly head again. My mind is strange beast and my thoughts quickly go to the worse case scenarios. As I sat in my car, I imagined thermal nuclear war was unleashed on Sacramento California and the air raid sirens can be heard everywhere. The missiles clearly visible through clouds in the sky, and meanwhile, I'm trapped in a McDonald's drive thru. The cars in front of me don't move. Can I drive over the curb and adjacent island with my small passenger automobile? Why won't the cars ahead of me move already? The world is ending and you want to wait in line at a McDonald's drive thru? I know it may sound silly, and as I type these words, it now feels a bit silly. However, at the time it feels like the end of the world is happening and I just want to go home!
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My dying car...