Tuesday, October 25, 2016

My air mattress couch has currently took the wind out of my sails.





I feel bad when I don't update my blog. I tell myself, "You can do it!" However, my illness (Paranoid Schizophrenia), as well as my severe depression, makes it extremely difficult to muster up the inner drive it takes to blog on a daily basis. Also, lately I've been really depressed. Sometimes my depression worsens during this time of year. The Fall and Winter months really kick my behind, when it comes to my well being for some reason. This past week I've been thinking a lot about my financial situation. It's something that stays on my mind constantly because I'm really short with money these days. And if that wasn't enough, the air mattress couch that my son and I share, has sprung a leak. One of the three chambers doesn't hold air for very long, and it becomes flat within an hour. I struggled to locate the leak, but to no avail. I remember when I bought the air mattress couch the beginning of this year. I was so happy because my son and I finally had a bed to sleep in, and we didn't have to sleep on the living room couch anymore. Sadly, I don't have the money to replace the air mattress couch at the moment. It will probably take a few months to save enough money to buy a new one, if I'm lucky. I wish I had a real bed, at least for my son because it makes me feel really guilty not being able to provide one for him. I know there are some people who might think that's just too bad, you shouldn't have had a kid if you were disabled and lived on a fixed income. However, if you read my blog, you'd know the story on how my son came into my life. For now, my son and I sleep on the air mattress couch, but if it loses a lot of air quickly, my son and I wake up in the middle of the night to sleep on our living room couch.



My son doesn't realize that I don't have a lot of money, but I can see his disappointment on his face. He wants his dad to furnish a bed for the both of us, and he doesn't understand how hard I'm trying to stay afloat financially. This weighs on me heavily because the guilt forces me into a downward spiral of severe depression. Right now, I'm doing my best to get through this difficult time but when I think of the future, it scares me a lot.




                      




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Please GoFundMe... In Need of Purchasing a Dependable Used Car, so I can visit my son regularly. Any amount would help and I'll be forever grateful. http://www.gofundme.com/m12hgk  Or you can send funds thru Paypal at my email arichere@yahoo.com Please read my story, as to why I need help. Thank You So Very Much!!!!

My dying car...