Today started like any other day. I woke up and sat up in bed, while I watched television. Sadly, it's how I spend most of my Wednesdays. I'm not complaining. I'm use to it by now, but I do want to make a positive change. So, on that note, I went to the local Subway and bought myself a turkey sandwich. I know it doesn't sound like a big deal, but it was a major accomplishment for myself. The whole process of getting ready to go outside is a difficult one, at least for me. Washing up, brushing my teeth, and getting dressed can be overwhelming. Also, depending on my mood, it often becomes a major chore to venture outside for the day. This morning I stepped outside and walked around the property that I live on. I noticed the birds, cows, and the horse next door. I embraced the whole scene. I was feeling alive again. After a few minutes of strolling, I got into my car and drove to Subway, in order to buy some lunch. The little interactions I get from the employees at the restaurant mean so much to me! To them, I'm sure I'm just another customer. I felt a sense of pride that I was able to accomplish something today. After arriving home, and finishing my sandwich, I felt a tinge of guilt. The reasoning behind the guilt was the fact that I spent money on myself. I don't have a lot of money to begin with, and I often wished I saved the money spent. I rather spend money on my son, to be honest. I know I have to treat myself sometimes, and this guilty feeling will subside. Who knew the simple act of going to Subway could mean so much?
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